More of the same. It's the long game.

This week my health update is just more of the same. Daily pills, try to eat healthy, exercise. Tired mostly. Nothing is going to change immediately, so I have to keep focused on the daily effort with the long term goals in mind. Not much to say about it. I wondered if I would post anything at all. Do you care if I do? I really do wonder.

Two a day, every day

Exercise has come a little harder, but it also gives me much needed energy and endorphins. Mind over muscle when the early fatigue kicks in only minutes into the effort. Blood draw results were posted but I don't meet with the cancer doc until this week to see what he thinks. I can see that all the important numbers are lower than they used to be and a bit lower than they should be. White & red blood cell count, hematocrit, etc. Probably a big part of why I feel tired so easily. But nothing looks alarming at least from what I can see.

Still experiencing pain in my side where the tumor (BFT) is pushing it's way around where it shouldn't be. You know that painful stitch you get in your side when you run harder than you are really in good enough shape to do? Yeah, kind of like that but all the time. Well, constant when it's there. Some days I don't feel it much at all, other days it's ever present. When it’s there I mostly just try to ignore it as best I can.

Stopped by an open house at a local massage therapy clinic in downtown Pleasant Grove and talked to a therapist with some ideas about lymphatic massage treatment. Sounds interesting and might be something I try. I don’t usually get too many massages as they feel like an expensive indulgence, but I sure enjoy them when I do indulge. In this case I can call it therapeutic, right? Right? Started reading another one of the (many) cancer related books given to me, curious for additional insights and ideas. I figure any tool that might help is worth looking into for how it might apply to me.

I haven't been perfect in my dietary choices the last few weeks despite best intentions. Mostly good, just sometimes not eating the best foods when a little indulgence just sounded too good to pass up. A little too much bread and dairy. Something I can improve in the coming weeks. Still I've been cutting back on meats and eating more whole foods. Planning to read more on some specific diet choices friends have sent me info about. Always more I can do.

Consistency WILL Win

My thoughts this week have been about how doing small things consistently keeps us moving to our goals. Whether it's health, fitness, diet, skills, self-improvement, most anything. This kind of goes against my nature. If there's a quick solution or a shortcut, I'm looking for it.

Patience. Do the small things.

We don't always get to pick our journey, but we can choose how we travel that road.

This cancer forces me to use this approach because sprinting to the finish isn't an option. Treatment is going to be the same thing each day for a long time. A long, long time.

Still wish we could have done surgery already. Cut it out and start recovery. Be past the problem and more forward. But moving forward right now is the treatment. Not just manage the pain, but actively put into every day that which is going to help in the fight. Even the small things. Especially the small things. Baby steps are still steps forward.

This is where I get frustrated sometimes, when I talk myself into a food indulgence or take it easy on some exercise. These days I feel like I'm not just letting myself down when I do or don't do something, I'm giving in when it matters much more. I'm letting down anyone watching my battle. It’s easy to get discouraged or even depressed.

Don't fail. Don't let them down.

Of course this is a bit overboard. I do realize that. But some days that's how I think. In some ways it's a good pressure I put on myself to pay attention to the details. When that alarm goes off at 5:20am it's motivation to get up and go workout despite really wanting to sleep longer after a less than perfect night. I really do find the most success when I stay consistent in the small things. Do those small things each day. That how I lost so much weight so quickly. No cheating. Stick to the plan in every way. I read a friend’s post about his January injury & workout setback and discouragement, but with it the reminder to dig deeper. Remember WHY I'm doing these things and it quickly becomes easier to stay on plan. Do things because I have a strong why as a foundation is why I am doing all these things. I can come back to when discouragement starts to take over. It's the long game I'm playing, and that means winning the battle each day in some way. They add up.

So as much as I may confess some failures in diligence or crack in the veneer, mostly I feel good about my efforts. I'm still positive and optimistic that I'm on a good path, and my efforts are going to pay off. I'm still able to live a pretty normal day and enjoy a good level of productivity. Another check in the win column.

Making memories, thanks to kindness

Enjoyed the BYU vs Gonzaga game, despite the loss. Good company

Very grateful for some kind, generous friends that gave us a couple of tickets to the BYU basketball game this week that let me spend some quality time with my son. Making memories that were far more valuable than the fact that BYU lost to a much better Gonzaga team. Win or lose, the time invested is well worth it. A highlight of the week for sure. Thank you!